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A simple wrist tie

18th January, 2016

A simple wrist tie

18th January, 2016

Single column tie article cover

Either you have crappy cuffs made by a small Taiwanese boy working triple shifts or a set of state issue police handcuffs that cost you more than your portable music device that plays pirated music. Are you feeling disappointed in life right now knowing you're supporting child labor and pirates? Absolve that by supporting your local No-Kill Animal Shelter. It has nothing to do with anything, it will just make you feel smug as fuck saving a kitten. Now that we have established you own the most popular restraint device know to humanity. Lets put it to some use...Wait you misplaced your key for the umpteenth time? Ugh!…Let's watch a youtube video on how to pick them. Yeah that will help set the mood. ...Oh, the undesirable clicking noise will be heard in the next room? Jesus! I’m already tired of the excuses and your partner is now a ramen noodle or the sahara desert. No more whining about the icy cold metal be slapped against their wrist. Toss that criminal restraint device out the hotel balcony and grab your god damn rope. The following will make panties drop.

Bondage has to begin somewhere

You have all this cord and need to put it to some use. Stop procrastinating and learn a non-tightening rope cuff. And guess what? If you don't, your chances of creating passion through restraint are worse than ever. Power doesn’t come from shitty handcuffs or even rope. It comes from knowing what the fuck you’re doing. And when you don’t? We can smell your desperation and lack of dominance. Are you trying to repulse your submissive? Because this is how you do it. Learning a Single Column Tie will restrain someone and resolve all the above issues faster than Google Fibers' attempt to come in to a neighborhood near you. Its also more personal than handcuffs. You are actually conjuring restraint by not using a man made device that you had no clue about its creation until you watched an episode of How it’s Made.

Show me what you got Rembrandt

I find myself getting confused when learning about new subjects. Certain things just have to many names for the same thing. Vagina, pink taco, wet sock, love canal, saving for marriage do me in the butt—is just a small list of what all hipsters learn in Eastern European Men School. You will see this tie referred to as Boola Boola and a Yuki Knot by other books and practitioners. I’m not a technical writer—and partly just don’t care—I'll only refer to it as Single Column Tie. It says what it is with zero confusion! When you break out of your bubble and decide to use this knot, it can easily bind wrists or ankles together. Thats lamer than dropping out of college to make a career as a super store greeter. I think you can be a little more creative than that. What about binding limbs to other objects like chairs?—That’s a start if your a wussy—Stop locking the wolf away and let the dominate side out. Try tying each arm and leg to its own bed post, then start illustrating your point like Bob Ross by taking your tree and planting it next to this happy bush.—Oh fuck, I thought he was about to ruin it…that Ross always keeping me in suspense.

Danger Will Robinson Danger

Under load this knot will collapse and tighten around the wrist, ankle, or anything it was anchored to. Yeah, no happy dance here. This could lead to loss of blood flow, nerve damage, and death if used around the neck.—The following is of personal opinion only and please keep in mind I'm not an expert—Don’t be a pompous micro dick nugget and wrap someones neck in rope! Do you want to be an asshole? Because thats how you become an asshole. And for the subs that let their neck get tied, you’re also stupid for letting them. I’ve never ever seen a situation where it was proper to tie someones neck. Use a real locking collar! I digress. The point is to have fun and play safe. The rewards of proper restraint will pay so many dividends.